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mcdude
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
A Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a pub. They proceed to each buy a pint of Guinness.
Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head.
The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.
The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!"
Gpour
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3/15/2007, 11:48 am
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mcdude
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
I REALLY like this one!
quote:
His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Finnegan.
"Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant.
"She spo ke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.
Glogo Gsmile Gpour
Last edited by mcdude, 3/15/2007, 12:27 pm
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3/15/2007, 12:26 pm
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mcdude
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
YIKES!!! A St. Pattie's Day Blizzard! About 15 inches predicted for the Shamrock Cafe. Good thing we have lots of BEER!!!!
Last edited by mcdude, 3/16/2007, 9:02 am
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3/16/2007, 9:01 am
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RI SwampYankee
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
...and we don't have to drive home.
Gpour
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I tried snorting coke once .... but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
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3/16/2007, 10:06 am
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SKOKEY
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
I'm still on the clock and can't have a Gpour yet. Keep the taps flowing and I'll be back in a few hours.
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3/16/2007, 12:33 pm
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RI SwampYankee
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
Three Wishes
An Irish woman famous for her charitable work was granted three wishes by a fairy godmother.
"My" she said, I have everything I could possibly want in life. What more can I wish for?"
She thought for a moment and said "Well, I suppose a new living room chair would be nice, I've had that one for 32 years"
Within seconds, the fairy godmother had delivered a new chair. "Now what about your second wish?"
"Well, if you insist, I suppose a new car would be nice to get me to church"
No sooner were the words spoken than a brand new car appeared on the drive.
"And for you third wish?" asked the fairy godmother.
"Well I suppose there’s no point in having a new car without somebody to share it with.
Could you possibly turn my loyal and loving cat into a handsome young man?"
Almost immediately, the cat was turned into a handsome hunk.
The young man strolled over to the woman and said "I Bet you're sorry you had me neutered now."
---
I tried snorting coke once .... but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
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3/16/2007, 1:30 pm
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The Knife
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
quote:
mcdude wrote:
Irish they were... and drunk for sure and they sat in the comer of the newly refurbished Shamrock Cafe. Across the wall opposite was a huge mirror, fourteen feet long and stretching from floor to ceiling.
Glancing around the room Mack the Knife suddenly spotted their reflection in the mirror.
'JScott, JScott, he whispered. 'Don't look now but there's two fellas over there the image of us!'
'In the name of God, said JScott, spotting the reflection. 'They're wearing identical clothes and everything.'
'They are indeed, said Mack. 'I'm going to buy them a drink.'
But as Mack started to rise from his seat, JScott said, 'Sit down Mack one of them's coming over here!
I don't know who those guys were but one wasn't too friendly. 8( I got out of my seat and when I went to shake his hand, he slapped mine away ! I made a face and he made one right back. I waited silently for an explanation but he never said anything. Some people !!Whacky
flyby
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Real men use 1911 not 911 ! - Mac the Knife
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3/16/2007, 1:34 pm
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RI SwampYankee
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
The Many Uses of Toilet Paper
A Irish husband and wife were laying in bed one night. The wife got up to go to the bathroom and look in the mirrior.
She complains to her husband, "My boobs are to small!!"
The husband looks at her and says, Just take toilet paper and rub them every day. As the months went by she went back to the mirror again. And said the same as before.
The husband says laughing, "It worked for your butt."
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I tried snorting coke once .... but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
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3/16/2007, 1:43 pm
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mcdude
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
IRISH TRIVIA
Did you know that ...
The Harp is the official Emblem of Ireland, not the Shamrock. The handheld Harp was played by our Celtic Forefathers.
It was Saint Patrick who made the Shamrock so popular.
The potato"e" Potato is not native to Ireland. It was orginally brought to Ireland from the American Continent.
Ireland is not the only place Gaelic is spoken. It is also spoken on the Isle of Man, and in Scotland.
The Book of Kells, an ancient illustration of the Bible, is over1000 years old. Beside it at Trinity College, Dublin The Book of Durrow. It was created by Irish Monks.
Over 40% of the United States Presidents had Irish ancestors.
Eamon De Valera was the first President of the Irish Republic. He was born in Manhattan, New York City.
Hibernia (Latin) and Éire (Gaelic) mean "Ireland". [i.e. Ancient Order of Hibernians (AOH)]
Irish & Irish-Americans laid the ground work for America's Bridges, Tunnels, and Subways. Many lost their lives as Sandhogs.
Mike Quill (b.1905, d.1966) born in County Kerry, Ireland was the founding president of the Transport Workers Union of America. During his tenure the U.S. labor movement made great strides.
Irish Triads are the arrangement of ideas in groups of three. Many of these triads are witty, with an amusing climax - or anticlimax - in the third item.
Ceide Fields is the most extensive Stone Age Monument in the world. It is in, North Mayo, a farming community that is fifty centuries old.
70 Million people, worldwide, can claim Irish ancestry.
St. Brendan, an Irish Monk, was a 5th century sailor. It is alleged that he discovered America before Christopher Columbus.
St. Patrick's Day, the way we celebrate it, is more American than Irish. In Ireland, St. Patrick's Day is a religious holiday-shops and businesses are closed to give everyone a day off to be spent with family and friends.
Catholics begin their day by attending Mass. Families gather for celebratory meals and spend the day at popular sporting events-Gaelic games, championship rugby matches or a steeplechase. There are big parades in Dublin and Belfast to celebrate national pride.
It is said there are more Americans of Irish descent in America than there are Irishmen in Ireland. Americans celebrate St. Patrick's Day with such fun and wild abandon that many people in Ireland tune in their televisions to watch celebrations and parades in the U.S..
The first St. Patrick's Day celebration in America was in 1737 hosted by the Charitable Irish Society of Boston. The second was established in 1780 by the Friendly Sons of St. Patrick in Philadelphia.
It is not known if March 17 is celebrated because it is the date of St. Patrick's birth or his death. Some claim it is both, others say neither. As to St. Patrick's birthplace, the only definite statement is that he most certainly was not born in Ireland. He founded 165 churches and started a school with each one. St. Patrick is widely acknowledged as the patron saint of Ireland.
There are no snakes in all of Ireland thanks to St. Patrick. Of all the legends surrounding this popular figure, the most long-lived is the story of St. Patrick driving the snakes from Ireland. As the population of Ireland looked on, St. Patrick pounded a drum and banished the snakes.
The shamrock is seen everywhere on St. Patrick's Day. St. Patrick used the shamrock when he preached the doctrine of the Trinity as a symbol of its great mystery. Today, it is widely worn in Ireland and America to celebrate Irish heritage. In fact, several million shamrock plants are grown in County Cork, Ireland, and shipped all over the world for St. Patrick's Day.
(Brought to you by the Emerald Society NYCT)
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3/16/2007, 5:30 pm
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mcdude
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Re: ST. PATRICK'S DAY 2007
click here for
<<<SNOW WATCH CAM>>>>
spongebob fish rollsmile flipoff filu
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3/16/2007, 6:18 pm
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