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The Knife
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Thx for the ****tail
Very tasty ****tail, thx Mcd ! Now where are you storing those images ? Good to hear ImageShack will accept more jpgs when I get around to that. The opener is on the left <---- use it anytime you care to =D
Now I have to figure out how to do that crazy scrolling thing-a-ma-bob :escher:
MTK aka Mac the Knife
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Real men use 1911 not 911 ! - Mac the Knife
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3/10/2006, 9:59 pm
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oldhickory
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 Re: Shot and a Beer? Some Irish Humor
Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp. "What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.
"Jamie O'Conner and me had a wee bit of a fight," says Paddy. "That little ****, O'Conner!" says Sean, "He couldn't do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."
"Aye, that he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."
"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself, didn't you have something in your hand?"
"That I did," said Paddy, reflecting... "Mrs. O'Conner's
breast, and a thing of grand beauty it is, but useless in a fight."
=D
An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver, where 'ave ya been?"
"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.
"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite wee bit to drink this evening."
"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.
"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
=D
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya".
Of course you can come in, you're always welcome here, Tim. But where's my husband?"
"That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda." There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery"
"Oh, God no, please!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry.
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, Brenda, no. As a matter of fact, he climbed out three times to pee."
=D
A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth, sits down but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the
drunk continues to sit there. Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall. The drunk mumbles, "ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either."
=D
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"Carved on these walls is the story of America, of a continuing quest to preserve both democracy and decency, and to protect a national treasure that we call the American dream."
- President George Bush
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3/10/2006, 10:04 pm
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uneValkyrie
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
God, I need a drink -- I'm getting beaten up over there at Wolfenet. Someone even gave me two negative karmas!
Make it a double, thanks in advance.
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. . . now I can fit a warhead and a thug in my trunk . . . Evonovitch
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3/12/2006, 10:05 pm
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DRH1
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
Hey, McDude, I finally made it! Took me a while to figure out why it wouldn't accept my screen name, but I got it to work by adding a "1" after it. Think I've set up my avatar too, but won't know until I preview this. Whew ... I need a beer!
Or, a ****taill!! :(
(Ugh ... I just previewed this and my avatar looks awful. I reduced it to 60 X 60 pixels (per the instructions), but it's being expanded and it's breaking up. Any ideas?
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3/12/2006, 11:54 pm
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The Knife
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 Re: Shot and a Beer?
quote:
(Ugh ... I just previewed this and my avatar looks awful. I reduced it to 60 X 60 pixels (per the instructions), but it's being expanded and it's breaking up. Any ideas?
My guess is you need to resize your avatar to the forum standard, which I think is 125 pixels x 125 pixels. The "Dudemeister" (master of many forums ) or Skokey can assist you further should I be wrong. :roar:
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Real men use 1911 not 911 ! - Mac the Knife
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3/13/2006, 1:07 am
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DRH1
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
Thanks for the advice, Knife. I originally reduced the avatar to 60 X 60 pixels because that's what the Control Panel specifies. But I've created a new one that is 125 pixels wide, which looks a bit better.
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3/13/2006, 11:17 am
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mcdude
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 Avatar Size
Hey DRH! Welcome!
I did set the avatar size larger (125 X 125) so that if you were going to use a photo for your avatar you could at least see it! Also that is the size used at the WOffL forum, also a runboard forum, so when they visit here their avatar automatically migrates with them. Sorry I wasn't up last night at 10:54 to join you for that beer! McD
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3/13/2006, 11:34 am
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mcdude
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
quote:
uneValkyrie wrote:
God, I need a drink -- I'm getting beaten up over there at Wolfenet. Someone even gave me two negative karmas!
Make it a double, thanks in advance.
I was just over at
<<<WOLFEBORO.NET>>>
and I must have missed that thread! On what thread are they beating you up? 
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3/13/2006, 11:36 am
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oldhickory
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
Too many responding without stating who they were responding to and including quotes without attributing the quotes, made the head spin. I gave up trying to figure out who was answering who.
Knife-I like the signature.
---
"Carved on these walls is the story of America, of a continuing quest to preserve both democracy and decency, and to protect a national treasure that we call the American dream."
- President George Bush
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3/13/2006, 4:08 pm
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SKOKEY
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Re: Shot and a Beer?
DRH1,
Your avatar was still a little squished so I unsquished it and cleaned up some of the details for you.
http://img353.imageshack.us/img353/1369/drh17sr.jpg
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3/13/2006, 9:04 pm
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