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Elfdragoli
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Serious critique needed


on untitled yet. my siblings and friends of mine say it's good enough to be published, but I want you people to rip it apart, k? I really need to know. Don't post the critique on untitled yet, but put it here where I can read it.

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Being a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but being a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.
10/31/2005, 11:53 pm Send Email to Elfdragoli   Send PM to Elfdragoli Blog
 
Bookworm7
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Re: Serious critique needed


It's really good. I can't find really any mistakes. (I'm no expert.) I'd go through and "rip it apart", but I don't have time right now. Your doing great. Keep up the good work! emoticon
11/2/2005, 11:15 am Send Email to Bookworm7   Send PM to Bookworm7
 
Elfdragoli
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Re: Serious critique needed


My mom was complaining about switching back and forth from formal to informal descriptions at times. Anybody have any clue what she's talking about?

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Being a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but being a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.
11/2/2005, 10:52 pm Send Email to Elfdragoli   Send PM to Elfdragoli Blog
 
Bookworm7
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Re: Serious critique needed


I looked up informal in Harbrace College Handbook 8 this is what it says:

quote:


Avoid imformal words in formal writing

Words or expressions labeled Informal or Colloquialin college dictionaries are standard English and are used by speakers and writers every day. These words are thus appropriate in informal writing especially in dialouge. But informal words or expressions are usually inappropriate in formal expository compositions. In formal writing, use instead the general English vocabulary, the unlabeled words in your dictionary.

Informal In class the teacher gave a definition of polyunsaturated, but I didn't get it.

General In class the teacher gave a definition of polysaturated, but I didn't understand it.

As a rule, contractions are avoided in formal writing. Contracted forms like
won't, there's, or she's are normally writtne out: will not, there is or there has, she would or she had.




Do you understand?

Source: Harbrace College Handbook 8, by John c. Hodges and Mary E. Whitten, Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, Inc. copyright 1977. pg.183-184

Last edited by Bookworm7, 11/3/2005, 10:45 am
11/3/2005, 8:45 am Send Email to Bookworm7   Send PM to Bookworm7
 
Elfdragoli
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Re: Serious critique needed


Yeah, I "got it". Just still need critique people!!!!!!!!

---
Being a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but being a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.
11/6/2005, 12:00 am Send Email to Elfdragoli   Send PM to Elfdragoli Blog
 


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