Fenshae
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Registered: 05-2007
Posts: 9
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The Writing "Blahs"
So maybe it's just because I graduated with my bachelor's a week ago and I've been hit with an overwhelming set of emotions I can't quite explain or deal with, and as so often happens my writing is mirroring the rest of my life...but I've been hit with an unshakable feeling of inferiority and depression about my writing these past couple dyas.
How do you deal with that feeling that you're just a two-bit hack, that you don't actually have any talent? That your writing is unsalable, unreadable, that the best you can possibly ever hope for is maybe a story or two in an obscure lit mag that nobody but other struggling writers ever reads?
How do you deal with the thought that you could be pouring your heart and soul into something that might never amount to anything, that you will have wasted your entire life chasing unicorns, being just another daydreamer who didn't do much?
How do you shake that feeling that maybe the literary vs genre debates that only seem to happen in college classes maybe are true--that you're trapped in that hazy place between the two, that you're not brilliant enough to be the next Great American Author but you're not formulaic enough to make any money, either?
And above all else...how do you go to your 9 to 5 every day without finishing the shift crying for fifteen minutes in your car on the drive home because you're absolutely terrified that this really is all there is to life, that you'll never make a career of your writing, that you're going to be trapped in a lousy job to pay the bills for your entire life while your creativity is slowly eaten away by the sheer banality of existence?
In short....how do YOU deal with the Writing Blahs?
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5/20/2007, 5:16 pm
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Firlefanz
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Registered: 05-2003
Location: Germany
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Re: The Writing "Blahs"
*hugs*
I usually stop writing for a while and play games. Or read so badly written novels that I know I can do better than that. 
First of all, however, congrats for making Bachelor. That's something you managed to do, something you put in a lot of effort. Well done!
You do sound rather dramatic - I'm not sure I felt that bad about my writing, but I've been pretty far down. So far, these thoughts have passed after a while, so maybe that's a little bit of hope right there.
For more, I'm sending you a PM. 
--- - Firlefanz
Writing: "Kiera und der Gauklerjunge" - novel
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5/21/2007, 3:03 am
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McDoogle
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Registered: 01-2005
Location: Cloudy Cold Cleveland
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Re: The Writing "Blahs"
Hi Fenshae!
As a two bit hack, you have my sympathy. At least you aspire to being published in an obscure lit mag - my writings not even that good!
My 8 to 5 job is far below my BS in CS degree - but it pays the bills. I don't cry on the drive home because... I'm a guy.
So how do you get through it all????
Well, why do you write, Fenshae? Could you stop writing if you wanted to? It's been said: "Writers write!" That doesn't mean publication, or money, or millions of loyal readers (although that's the hope and goal), just that you are a creative person who is going to pour your heart and soul into a literary pursuit - because it's who you are. Writing success shouldn't be based on how much a work is sold for. Really, there's some complete garbage out there on the NY Best Sellers list.
Also, find someone encouraging and supportive to talk to. SFGirl, for one, is a great source of help and encouragement during my biggest writer blahs (and writer blocks!).
Also, if you can tap into that banality of existence - you can transfer those emotions into some truly inspired writing. My most creative works were written during my lunch hours at a steel mill.
Most importantly, I think, always be true to yourself.
Best writing wishes, Fenshae!
McDoogle
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Now Race Reading vs. nephew: Furies Of Calderon
Slightly Writing: 'Resume for a Gladiator' (2005 novel)
Watching: Pushing Daisies (X- Canceled!!)
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5/21/2007, 4:13 pm
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Lady Romance
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Registered: 10-2006
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Re: The Writing "Blahs"
I feel bad that you are going through this, but at the same time I'm just happy I'm not the only one going through the writing blahs.
It was just a few days ago I sat in my comfy chair and pondered the question "Why do I do this?" I felt so bad and horrible about everything, my writing being the main target of my despair. I seriously debated on taking ALL of my work, reference books and anything related to writing and putting it in the garbage. I figured I'd follow up with a call to Sherry (AKA SFGirl) and tell her I was no longer going to attend our writers group.
But, I didn't.
Why? You may ask.
Besides the fact that I have several writing friends who would swiftly kick me in the butt, I knew that one day very soon I'd wake up and regret it. Let's face it. I LOVE TO WRITE!! I wondered to if this is it for me. Who knows? Maybe I'll get published, maybe not. But in the mean time I'm doing something I love. When I feel like this, I put my writing aside for a few days...or longer if need be. I indulge myself with chocolate, watch comedy movies and do whatever else I want.
I can't dwell on the "what ifs" of my life. Life is too short. So, live for today. Write with your heart and use that imagination God gave you!!
Am I making sence? I hope so. I tend to ramble. What I guess i'm trying to say is: do what you love today, and don't worry about what tomorrow will bring.
I wish you the best of luck. Hope I made you feel better, and not worse. 
Congrats to on getting your degree!! You put alot of work getting that. Be proud of it.
Oh, one more thing. This is a motto I live by. No matter how bad things seem today, they will get better tomorrow.
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5/23/2007, 5:31 pm
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Fenshae
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Registered: 05-2007
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Re: The Writing "Blahs"
Wow, I certainly do seem to have a penchant for the dramatic at times
Ah well. My day job has just been driving me nuts lately (a combination of petty politics and shift work--oh goody!) and I don't think I ever realized just how hard graduating would hit me.
Thanks for all the support/responses!
I'm trying go get myself revved up to do some serious writing over the summer now that I've got a little more free time. Somehow, I only ever feel depressed about writing when I'm not doing it. Go figure.
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5/27/2007, 9:06 am
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