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Iam Helium
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Location: www.thespoof.com/
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
"if I were in fact associated with thespoof.com, my response to that would be,"
quote:
Bob Deadwords wrote:
quote:
Iam Helium wrote:
Jack has asked me to deal with the legal and moral applications in the forum. I am taking no chances about getting hauled into court, again. The forum is a tricky monster. Everyone has a damn opinion, but they don't need to say it on my forum. I wish these dopes would just abide by the rules, then maybe I wouldn't need to close it down yet again. Can you understand this Bob?
You mean the English language? - Yes.
quote:
Iam Helium wrote:
The Spoof is a privately owned website. We reserve the right to place on it whatever content we deem suitable for our readers. The Spoof does not condone sexually explicit story content. One of the members here (who shall remain nameless) is a sexually obsessed woman who does her best to resemble a slut. Why? It isn't necessary for a good website? It's so degrading, Jack and I decided that we would offer a site with good Christian values and we would keep it clean of the more clutter (pants) type of content you might find on another spoof site. And FYI folks. I am Helium!
You're Freaking taking us all for ride here. I thought to resist, but this is just total BS, Hah - Christian Values, S**t, I bit my own tongue.
That aside I'll get back on track.
Speaking of the general management and rules, in the pre-Helium history of the forum, when all seemed well, there was a series of events that I feel forever changed the spirit and original intention of the (Lowton) Spoof. An exceptionally talented and verbose female writer, (notice that I've underlined female), joined the group and literally rocked Jack O'Farrell's world. Would you care to comment on this or anything Jack might have shared with you regarding his feelings for Ms. Givings?
The only thing she changed for me was to increase my work load. I warned Jack right out of the gate about Ms. Givings. She was easy to be rid of however, we just gave her enough rope and she had no choice but to hang herself. I think Jack is around, maybe he can answer this himself because I shouldn't really be speaking for him.
Last edited by Iam Helium, 2/10/2005, 5:31 pm
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Explanations? EXPLANATIONS??? I don't need to explain pooh to you!
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2/10/2005, 5:29 pm
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Bob Deadwords
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
Iam Helium wrote:
The only thing she changed for me was to increase my work load. I warned Jack right out of the gate about Ms. Givings. She was easy to be rid of however, we just gave her enough rope and she had no choice but to hang herself. I think Jack is around, maybe he can answer this himself because I shouldn't really be speaking for him.
So you were there earlier than I remember, unless you had another ID ? ...or Ms. Givings had another? Don't answer that.
With regard to 'speaking for Jack', isn't that your job?
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listening is like reading, without the strain
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2/10/2005, 6:23 pm
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Jack Of
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
"If I were in fact associated with thespoof.com, my response to that would be,"
Well now I think I see where all of this is coming from. It looks like Miranda's minoins have got themselves an objective.
I think now that Ms. Givings has had a taste of success with her own site, she knows why I had to do what I did.
Don't you have anything more substanitive Bob?
Any writer here willing to submit quality satire that aims at broad audience, and can conform to the Spoof policies is still welcome.
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confusious rains
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2/10/2005, 6:32 pm
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IamJack
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
Jack Of wrote:
Well now I think I see where all of this is coming from. It looks like Miranda's minoins have got themselves an objective.
if I were in fact associated with thespoof.com, my response to that would be:
That was Helium posting for me, but I endorse every word he written.
As my editor, I often tell Helium to take a few old Spoof stories and update them into current stories. Unfortunately we sometimes choose stories from authors who we've banned because there are so many of them. But Helium assures me that we can't be held to account if Google complain because we've banned them. Once in a while he may accidentally choose an old sex story to update but as good Christians we try to kill those before they get too many clicks. I've told Helium we can't have women writing about sex. That would never do.
But we never allow our writers to make old stories into new stories on their own! That would not be fair to us. If they insist on doing this, I have no alternative other than to kill the story completely and ban them. Obviously this can cause hard feelings. So do NOT update your own stories! If Google News complain about the sex, we simply kill the story and blame the slut who wrote it. What can be fairer than that?
The very worst thing you can do with a story is slip a few sexual innundoes in well down the page. Google will pick up on these and you'll earn a lot of points and our advertisers will pay us lots of cash. But Helium and I will have to ban you when we get around to spotting your story.
The Top 15 list is certainly not a list of the best satire writers on Spoof. We kicked their slutty butts off long ago. It IS a list of writers that are respectful enough to produce a quantity of stories that consistently use titles that contain popular Google search terms. Those are the only things that should matter to a good Spoof writer. Because clicks are where it's at people. Just ask the two writers we send a pay check to every month.
THE REAL JACK
Last edited by IamJack, 2/10/2005, 9:06 pm
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2/10/2005, 7:24 pm
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Iam Helium
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
Bob Deadwords wrote:
quote:
Iam Helium wrote:
The only thing she changed for me was to increase my work load. I warned Jack right out of the gate about Ms. Givings. She was easy to be rid of however, we just gave her enough rope and she had no choice but to hang herself. I think Jack is around, maybe he can answer this himself because I shouldn't really be speaking for him.
So you were there earlier than I remember, unless you had another ID ? ...or Ms. Givings had another? Don't answer that.
With regard to 'speaking for Jack', isn't that your job?
Not when the subject is Ms. G. Those two have taken their mutual disrespect to levels never before seen by man.
Jack has caught up with us here in this interview, which is good. I am certain he will address any items that might fall through the cracks during my feedback to Bob's questions.
PS - one or both of these Jacks posting is the real deal. You should heed any of his instructions and always reply with the respect that Jack deserves.
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Explanations? EXPLANATIONS??? I don't need to explain pooh to you!
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2/10/2005, 7:44 pm
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IamJack
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
Iam Helium wrote:
Jack has caught up with us here in this interview, which is good.
if I were in fact associated with thespoof.com, my response to that would be:
I am, and I want you to all to know Helium has my full sapport.
quote:
I am certain he will address any items that might fall through the cracks during my feedback to Bob's questions.
Always. Helium has my full support. His genius, hard work and loyalty have made The Spoof the leading satire site on the Internet.
quote:
You should heed any of his instructions and always reply with the respect that Jack deserves.
I couldn't have put it better myself. I am a very important man who has done many important things in important ways for lots of very important people and I want you all to know and respect my importance.
Helium saw through 'Ms Givings' and warned me that she was a troubal making jezbel.
But as a Christian I felt it was my duty to let her hang herself with her own sex filth.
Did you know that she wrote about her own vagina? Decent, God-fearing Women have no business writing about vaginas, or sex.
The few stories of hers that slipped through last week were due to a technical hitch. Or so Helium has firmly assured me.
I do not care what mask 'Ms Givings' cares to hide behind, 'Brina Banks' 'dervijan' or any of the other crazy names she uses. Make no mistake, I will not tolerate the ungodly and the unclean on The Spoof.
Last edited by IamJack, 2/10/2005, 8:54 pm
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2/10/2005, 8:08 pm
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briannabanks
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
IamJack wrote:
Make no mistake, I will not tolerate the ungodly and the unclean on The Spoof.
Yeah? You friggin' hypocrites!
WTF is all this then:
Prostitution Awareness Week
Perverts Flock to Virginia!
Jesus Christ admits – I didn’t mean it.
Madonna ends land row "Rambling okay but no shagging"
Reality Sex on Fox TV
Does anyone still wanna listen to these two wankers spewing jizz?
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without nipples breasts would be pointless
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2/10/2005, 9:32 pm
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JJ Jogolo
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
quote:
briannabanks wrote:
quote:
IamJack wrote:
Make no mistake, I will not tolerate the ungodly and the unclean on The Spoof.
Yeah? You friggin' hypocrites!
WTF is all this then:
Prostitution Awareness Week
Perverts Flock to Virginia!
Jesus Christ admits – I didn’t mean it.
Madonna ends land row "Rambling okay but no shagging"
Reality Sex on Fox TV
Does anyone still wanna listen to these two wankers spewing jizz?
It's almost confusing... are Jacko and IamJack the same person? Is it really jack? Is helium really helium? Is any gas really who it says it is? LOL
I see their hypocracy, and it is very real, they have always had their favorites and have always practiced a "do as I say, not as I do" protocol. So, I don't know who's real and who's not, but I think at least some of this is on the up and up. Just not most of it. I suspect that Iam Jack is an imposter but it will take a few more post to nail it down.
I am going to lurk for a while - I get too involved emotionally (on the spoof subject) to post messages in the positive manner I normally choose to use. I get angry at their posts but I still want to read them, I just need to not reply anymore.
Bye!
Last edited by JJ Jogolo, 2/10/2005, 9:50 pm
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2/10/2005, 9:49 pm
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darvijen
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
I agree with JJ. It's turning into a bit of a freak show, isn't it?
Btw, I'm pissed as hell that Ms. G got credit for writing about her vagina when it was me who did that. Ms. G only wrote about washing her pussy. I wrote about shaving my vagina... which is a very different thing. For one thing, my vagina doesn't meow (well, not usually). And my vagina story never made it out of the gate. I think it was Dr. Jones (bless his soul) who pulled the carpet out from that one, as it was his comments in my pending folder.
So carry on, Helium, Jack One and Jack Two. I must say, it is turning into an entertaining interview. Love your nose, Iam Jack, but watch the typos, darling. You're looking a tad bit like a retard.
Last edited by darvijen, 2/11/2005, 12:07 am
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Sometimes I wake up horny. Other times I just let him sleep.
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2/10/2005, 9:53 pm
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RichLather
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Re: Interview With Spoof Admins
All vagina's aside, did somebody say MONEY?
I'm not a great writer. Hell, I'm not even a GOOD writer. I have a reasonable command of the English language, know how to use spellcheck and enjoy pumping out a little humor every now and then.
I must say that my limited run at the Spoof left a less-than-pleasant taste in my mouth. I was called on the carpet several times for stories that I thought were relatively tame; terms you would find in your local newspaper.
The whole idea of doing this for fun and getting stuff kicked back is a pain. If I were getting paid for it, then the editor is king; just gimme my money. Otherwise, get off my back. We're doing this **** for free and you're making money off of it.
That's why I stopped writing for the spoof.
Good Christian? Ain't that one of them thar oxymorons?
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2/11/2005, 1:08 am
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