Welcome To Mutant X  Team   Challenges Support Search runboard.com       Sign up (learn about it) | Sign in (lost password?) Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Challenges Challenges By Nalaniangel rated PG for mention of sex Summary: Just as Brennan and Shalimar confess their love to eachother, Brennan finds out he's going to die. "Where are they…" I muttered as I reached the playground of a park. We had all agreed to regroup there after we were done with our part of the assignment Adam had given us. I shaded my eyes from the glaring sun beating down on me and swept my gaze across the huge park. There were a lot of children playing and their parents were disinterestedly reading newspapers and novels. Finally, off into the horizon, I saw two figures silhouetted against the sun on the basketball court. “They’re over here, Emma,” I shouted, turning to Emma, who was walking down the greenbelt away from me already towards Brennan and Jesse. As I neared, I couldn’t help but stare at Brennan. He was so beautiful- perfectly sculpted muscles, tall, messy hair, glistening in sweat which rolled off his adorable face. It was all I could do not to launch myself at him. “Who’s winning?” Emma shouted to them as we stepped onto the sidelines. “I am,” Brennan answered quickly. “Yeah right,” Jesse shouted. As proof, he lined up his shot at half court and launched the ball. It flew past the basket, not even close to getting it in. “Sure, Jesse,” Emma teased. Jesse ran past to go retrieve the ball and Emma left my side to go chase him. Brennan stood waiting on the court, breathing hard. Being a few yards away from him and a lot shorter, from my angle he looked more like a god, posing on a Greek platform in town square, emanating power and sex. Suddenly, I was aware that he was talking to me, and I looked up at him, completely embarrassed. I was glad it was so hot so that the pink in my cheeks wouldn’t be so noticeable. “What?” I stuttered, trying to meet his eyes, which meant I had to tear my eyes away from his body. He smiled. “Who are you rooting for?” he repeated. “The winning side,” I answered. Before Brennan could say anything back, Jesse ran back on court and Emma returned to my side. I elbowed her and smiled, gazing from her to Jesse. “What?” she asked innocently, then burst into a smile. “It’s nothing, Shal. Jesse…” Emma trailed off, watching Jesse in the same way I had been looking at Brennan. I laughed and began to watch the game again. Jesse ran upcourt and tried to line up his shot, but couldn’t with Brennan blocking him. Jesse tried to side step him, but lost control of the ball. It rolled past Brennan, but he didn’t move to pick it up and run down court with it to score another basket. Instead, he looked drained. His eyes were dead. Jesse grabbed the ball off the court and preceeded to make two more points. But he glanced over at us as if to say “did you see that too?” He checked the ball to Brennan, but Brennan bounced it back disinterested. He simply walked off the court and joined me and Emma. “How did your part go?” he asked. I laughed. “Since when did you care enough about a case to walk away from a game?” I expected Emma to back me up, but instead, I felt a slight presence in the back of my mind. I looked at Emma; her eyes told me to stop. “It- It went good,” I said, trying to put my worry out of my mind. “We found the informant and got a good lead. How did you two do?” “We got the disk,” Brennan answered. “So you’re ready to go?” “Yeah,” Emma answered. I nodded. Brennan walked past me, and I turned to follow him, wondering what could have happened to make his mood change like that. Emma fell behind to walk with Jesse to our car. Brennan’s eyes were still dead when I looked up at him curiously. He stared straight ahead, focused completely on getting to the car. I looked back down and glimpsed his hand. It was shaking slightly. “Brennan, are you feeling okay?” I asked quietly. “Fine,” he stated, difinity and frustration in his voice. I shrunk back a little, although I remained at his side, determined to not let anything faze me, especially in front of him. “I’ll tell you later,” Brennan conceded. A small smile broke across my face. “Okay,” I agreed, feeling a little better. But my worry reappeared when Brennan handed me the keys. “You drive,” he said hoarsely, getting into the passenger’s side. Brennan never missed up an opportunity to drive. He would go buy cars and fix them up. And the car we were in was one of the cars he worked on. Something wasn’t right. 4/24/2004, 6:57 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 2 I woke up with the thick haze of exhaustion still over me. I blinked my eyes once or twice in the dark, my feral senses helping me immensely. The digital clock on my bedside read 3:29 AM. No wonder I was still so tired. As I turned in my bed to try and fall asleep again, I was suddenly aware of somebody watching me. I heightened my feral senses and my eyes flashed yellow in the dark. My muscles tightened, ready to confront anything that was in my room. I sniffed the air and I relaxed instantly, knowing who it was. “Brennan, you can come in if you want,” I told him. Slowly, he walked through my doorway and stood above my bed, almost expectantly. I looked up at him in the same way, before I finally gave in and moved over. He lied down next to me and I lied on my side with my hand holding up my head. He lay like a person would in therapy, hands folded on his waist, staring straight up at the ceiling, nervous. I watched him for a while. Amazingly, my thoughts didn’t turn to sex at 3:30 am with Brennan in my bed. I waited patiently for him to talk. Obviously something big was going on in him that he wanted to talk about. I hoped it was about what had happened the day before at the park because I could hardly think about anything else since. Brennan lied there for so long that I found myself dazing off propped up on my pillow. “My sister died three years ago yesterday.” I snapped to attention, listening to his every word. “I’m so sorry, Brennan,” I managed to say. “I tried to ignore it all day, but Emma… my sister looked a little like Emma. Seeing her on the court made me think about her. That’s why I got upset yesterday afternoon. I’m sorry I snapped at you.” “It’s fine,” I answered. “I- I didn’t even know you had a sister.” “Well I did,” he said. I looked on sympathetically while he lay on my bed and began to cry silently. The tears fell from his eyes and made soft spots on my sheets. I wanted to wipe them away, but when somebody tells you something like that… how are you supposed to act? What do you do? I finally reached over and with the back of my hand dried his cheek. His eyes met mine and I smiled sympathetically at him. I became aware that I was wearing a skimpy spaghetti- strap top and my breasts were probably falling out, and my long blonde hair was draped around my shoulders and arms. Coupled with the way I was lying, I looked more like a sexy pin up than a sympathetic best friend. I wiped another tear away from Brennan’s face and realized how hot it was. “Brennan you’re burning-“ “I don’t.” I paused. “What?” I asked. “I don’t have a sister. I lied.” “Oh, okay,” I forced out, dumbfounded. “Yesterday…” His voice cracked and more tears spilled out. “I got tired.” “And?” I asked. “Everybody gets tired Brennan. You’ve been working so hard. Plus it was over 100 degrees yesterday afternoon and you were playing basketball.” “No,” he argued. “I never get that tired.” A small hole was beginning to form in my chest and I could feel the nervousness and dread fill it. “I couldn’t even breathe. I went to Adam and he told me…” “What?” I whispered gently. “I’m going to die.” My head swam, I felt dizzy, I collapsed down onto my bed and whispered “no…”. I wanted to break down and cry and hold Brennan so that he could never leave me. I wanted to kiss him tenderly and make up for all the time I was too scared to have with him. I wanted to tell him exactly why he couldn’t be dying- because I loved him and he deserved to live to share that love with me. “Shalimar, I am,” he whispered. “It’s a problem with my mutation. I don’t really know exactly, but I don’t have very long.” “Don’t talk like that,” I pleaded, desperate for him to stop. “You’re going to live. It doesn’t matter what Adam says. There has to be a way.” “There is no way. Adam is the one who knows the most about our mutations. He created them. If he says there’s no way-“ “There will be,” I argued. “So stop talking like you’re going to die-“ My voice cracked at “die” and I began to cry hard. I was desperate to do something to stop him from dying. The same man who had stood before me like a god the day before now lay in my bed dying. I refused to accept that. “I haven’t told Jesse or Emma yet. I would like it if you would tell Jesse since you two are so close.” “Stop it!” I shouted, grabbing Brennan’s shoulder and pulling him close. I kissed him passionately and I was relieved when he kissed me back. We eased into it and I moved my hand up to his shoulder, but Brennan put his hand over mine. Pulling away and breathing hard, he whispered something I couldn’t understand. “What?” I whispered curiously. “Nothing,” he answered, dismissing it, although I could tell it had been something he wanted me to know. “Is that what it takes to shut me up?” “It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it.” “Then why haven’t you done it before?” he asked. “I like your voice,” I said simply, looking into his eyes. I could see a longing and passion, but at the same time pain and anguish. He was a caged soul now, a free and life filled mind that was going to be taken by a body, which didn’t share the same dream. It wasn’t fair. “How do you want to spend the time you have left?” I asked him quietly, not daring to talk above a whisper. He looked straight into me, and answered, “With you.” I kissed him lightly and nestled next to him, with my head on his shoulder. Sometime in the night, we both fell asleep between laughing at old times and wondering what would happen in the future. It was pure torture knowing that he was going to leave and I would never be able to see him again. In most ways, almost every way, he was my life force. Facing a tough day was my privilege when he was at my side. When I was tired, he was my haven in which I could rest easy, knowing that I was safe. Whenever I was discouraged, just the sight of him was enough to send my spirit soaring. I had come to depend on Brennan as my teammate, my confidante, and my best friend. Adam had rescued me from my old life and given me a chance at a future. Brennan was that future. Watching over him quietly as he slept before I, too, succumbed to slumber, I was sure that he was my future and I knew that I was his. He had told me. And I promised him, I promised myself, that I would love him until he drew his last breath on earth, making sure that the time we had left would not be wasted. 4/24/2004, 6:58 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 3 "Shalimar… wake up," Brennan whispered, kissing my exposed neck tenderly. I smiled, still half asleep, and reached up, cradling his neck in my hand. I slowly opened my eyes and looked into his beautiful face, treasuring each moment I had. "I'm glad you're here," I murmured, smiling through the haze of the early morning that still covered my mind. "What do you want to do today?" Brennan smiled, obviously glad that I had asked. "Before you woke up-" "Before you woke me up," I corrected, interrupting him. "-I was thinking about that," Brennan continued. "I want to go out and fly the Helix." "But you do that every day," I protested. "Not for long," he gently reminded me. I bit my cheek- hard, to keep the tears from forming in my eyes. The promise I had made to myself the night earlier floated into my mind… I will love you until you draw your last breath on earth, making sure that the time we have left will not be wasted… I sighed heavily and sat up. Brennan grabbed my arm firmly and I almost thought he would pull me back down. Instead, he used it as leverage to sit up too. I cringed, but I turned away so he wouldn't be able to see it. The last thing he needed was for me to feel sorry for him. He always had hated that. I got out of bed, smiling as Brennan followed me to the bathroom. “So where are we going today?” I asked him, leaning against the doorframe so he could go past. Brennan’s lips brushed past mine so slightly that I was swept up and forced to follow him. I bit on my lip to keep from bursting into a huge grin, which would hardly reflect what was running through my spirit. He looked so strong in the morning light, his muscles rippling, his walk smooth, his stubbly face and soulful eyes tearing into me. I slipped my hand into his and he squeezed it hard, as if reminding me that he was still there. As we walked through the door we were slammed with the image of ourselves in the mirror. It was all I had ever wanted in what felt like a lifetime: I was holding Brennan’s hand; he was smiling as he looked into our reflection. He took a quick, lasting glance, then continued to walk, but was pulled back to me because I couldn’t move. I stood like a statue, glued to the floor in shock and sweet surprise. I stared into the mirror and could only see one thing: perfection. Not that Brennan was perfect, and certainly I wasn’t, but our bodies together, holding hands and smiling like we were in love, was. I looked at our image for a long time, noticing the way he held my hand, the way our hair was tousled, the way he looked at me instead of the mirror, his eyes taking me in as I took us in. It was breathtaking for me and in a second of pure joy before I could remember that it wouldn’t last, I threw my arm’s around Brennan’s neck and whispered in his ear, “I love you.” He pulled me back in surprise. “What?” he asked. “I love you,” I repeated, my voice faltering. With all that was within me I hoped that he would say it back. We stood that way for an eternity, before I felt his hands around my wrists as he gently took my arms off his shoulders. “Don’t do this to yourself,” he said sternly, detached. “Do what?” I asked, my heart dropping to the floor, and the empty space it left making me feel dizzy. “Don’t get closer to me all of the sudden, Shal. It’s not good for you.” “Good for me?” I repeated, almost laughing, my characteristic determination coming back to me. “You want to talk about what’s good for me? Good would be you living, ok? But that’s not going to happen, and so I want to make the time you do have count. And if you wanted what was good for me, then why did you come into my room last night and tell me all this… this **** about you wanting to spend time with me and kissing me and-“ “You kissed me, Shalimar,” he corrected, cutting me off. “You’re my best friend. I do want to spend time with you. And I do…” he trailed off, noticing my tears. Brennan reached out a rough hand and gently wiped them away with his thumb, his hand lingering on my face. “I do love you. But I love you enough to rather live without you than let you get hurt worse in the end.” “And what about what I want?” I shouted. “What do you want?” he shouted back. “I want you!” Brennan, although he must have been expecting my response, stood still. He turned his head and for a second I didn’t know what he was going to do, kiss me or walk away. Time was frozen. It had to have been because nothing was moving and I couldn’t tear myself away from his presence. I followed Brennan’s gaze across and my eyes landed on the mirror. He was staring at our perfect image. I looked too, but I couldn’t keep my eyes on it because now I knew what had seemed so certain might be taken away from me. Finally, he turned his face to me and moved in closer to mine, his lips touching mine briefly, until he pressed into me with so much force and passion that I stumbled back and hit the wall. I grabbed at his shoulders; he pulled me close at the waist. Then, as suddenly as it had happened, he stopped. “No…” I breathed, opening my eyes and looking into his. They were tired and red. The dread filled me again and I straightened up. “Brennan, are you alright?” I asked. He didn’t answer, but stumbled back. I wrapped my arms around his chest; I knew I couldn’t support him, but I could at least soften his landing. Brennan fell to the ground, his eyes rolled back. Quickly, his body started shaking. “Oh, god, Brennan!” I cried, lifting my comm. ring to my mouth. “Adam- Brennan just collapsed in my room!” I shouted. 4/24/2004, 6:58 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 4 The faint sounds of Adam working in the lab filled the silent halls of Sanctuary. Nobody dared say a word- the fragile peace that hovered around us threatened to break at anything and unleash the heartbreak we all were hoping to avoid for the moment. The only bright spot with Brennan being unconscious was that I wouldn’t have to tell Jesse about his condition. Adam had informed us all after he had gotten Brennan stabilized. I felt so selfish, but I didn’t know what to feel anymore. The man I loved was dying slowly. Was I supposed to feel grief? What I was feeling was beyond that. Regret? Of course. I had wasted three years with Brennan at my side without telling him that he was my day and night. Guilt? Pain? Sorrow? Anger? Hate? The hole inside of my soul harbored all of these. “He’s got no more than two months.” Adam’s guilt-ridden words were still playing over and over in my mind. “It was caused by his mutation. I’ll spare you the scientific details, but in effect, his body is breaking down at a cellular level. Brennan told me he didn’t want the procedure done to prolong his life, so-“ “You can save him?” I had blurted out. “No, I can prolong his life,” Adam had repeated. “How long?” I had asked. “A few years at least, possibly more depending on how he would respond to the treatment. Obviously, I’ve never had a need to use it before.” I closed my eyes as the hot tears streamed down my cheeks. Brennan could be saved. A few years was a long time- and there was no guarantee as to if any of us would live that long anyways. We were in a dangerous business. And Adam would work hard to save his life in the mean time. There was a real chance that he could find a cure in time. And Brennan had lied to me. The night before he had sworn to me that Adam couldn’t do anything, but he could. Why would Brennan choose to die? Did he want to go? There were too many questions running through my mind, causing the tears to cascade down. Maybe my feelings were too strong because it was only a few hours alone in my room before I heard a quiet tap on my door. I didn’t want to talk, but the person came in anyways. I took one sniff in the air and I knew who it was. Lavender- Emma’s scent. “What?” I muttered, trying not to let traces of crying enter my voice. “I- I could feel you from across the Sanctuary. You’re upset,” Emma said quietly, not daring to speak any louder than I was. “No ****,” I whispered under my breath. “Hey, maybe you can get away with this routine with Adam, but you can’t be defensive with the telempath,” Emma shot. “What are you going to do? Force me to talk? Read my thoughts and report them back to Adam?” I said sourly. “Like I said, maybe being angry can keep the guys away, but not me.” She sat down on the edge of my bed and I rolled over, turning away from her. “Shalimar, please talk to me. I know I can help.” “You can’t!” I shouted at her. “Brennan’s going to die and you can’t help that. And worse he’s going to let himself die and Adam’s going to go right along with that.” “Adam is doing what Brennan wants,” Emma argued calmly. “Brennan’s confused,” I whispered. “He doesn’t know what he wants. Last night he wanted to spend his life with me. Then today I find out that he wants to kill himself.” “He doesn’t want to kill himself. He’s going to die,” Emma corrected. “And Adam is doing what his patient wants.” “Adam doesn’t know what he wants! And he should be concerned with his son living! Maybe while Brennan’s life is-“ I paused bitterly- “prolonged, Adam can find a cure. We can’t just let him die!” Emma didn’t speak and the silence was deafening, until she finally spoke, tears evident in her voice. “I don’t want Brennan to die either. But if it’s what he wants, then we have to accept it, Shalimar. We don’t have the right to decide for him whether or not to live.” I turned around and faced her, a huge spot on my pillow wet from tears. “I want him to live,” I whispered desperately, despair taking over. “I don’t know how I’m going to live without him.” “I know,” Emma soothed, reaching out for me. I fell into her embrace and held onto her for dear life. “He told me he didn’t want to get involved with me even though he loves me because he doesn’t want to be hurt. But I want to be hurt. I would rather be hurt than waste the time I have with him.” Emma thought for a long time until she pulled away and looked into my eyes. “This new mutation that is killing him is a gift. Without it you might never have confessed your love for each other. This time you’ve been given before he dies, don’t waste it. Make it happy for him, but make it happy for you. Don’t let him sacrifice himself for you, but make sure you don’t sacrifice yourself for him.” I dried my tears on the sleeve of my shirt and tried to smile. “Thanks,” I whispered, my voice hoarse. “Anytime,” she whispered back. “So… tell me how you guys said you loved each other!” I laughed; it felt good. “Well he came into my room last night…” I could see Emma’s eyes light up at the beginning of the greatest romance story she ever expected to hear. 4/24/2004, 6:59 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 5 “Hi,” I whispered, coming into the med lab. Brennan lay on one of the beds dressed in a wifebeater and shorts. I bent over to kiss him, but he turned his head. “Adam told you.” I paused dejected and took a seat next to him. “Yes he did.” “And?” I looked over at him, but he wouldn’t meet my eyes. “And I don’t know why you don’t want to give living a try, but I’ll accept it, if it’s what you really want. But if you’re doing it for…” “You,” he filled in. “Right. If you’re going to give up because you don’t want to hurt me… I would rather be hurt. I don’t want you to die, especially on my account. Wouldn’t you rather live with me, if only for a few years, than die with me? Either way I’m going to be hurt, but I would rather have a few years with you first. And who knows what Adam will do in that time.” Brennan met my eyes and grabbed my hand. “I won’t hurt you,” he refused. “You’re going to hurt me either way!” I shouted. “But it’s not even your fault! So just get over your stupid man-pride and kiss me! God, Brennan, if you want to make me happy, then give me that!” Brennan sat up, reached over and grabbed my body close, kissing me passionately. We were hungry for each other, we grabbed each other’s bodies and I pressed my fingers into his back to try and deal with the swells of urge growing inside of me, until I could take it no longer. Our passions were finally let loose. And in the med lab, under the dimmed fluorescent lights, which shone as stars above our heads, we made love. Over the next month, Brennan and I settled into a strange but wonderful routine. Every night he would come into my room and wrap his arms around me. He wouldn’t kiss me then, and he never asked for my body, but the sweet love that surrounded us comforted me long into the night. He would eventually fall asleep next to me, but I would stay up until the sunlight cast its way through my window just taking him in and savoring every second I could in his presence. Awakened by a tender kiss in the morning, we would both go into the bathroom to get ready. We would step into the shower and the water would wash over us. I would massage his aching shoulders and back, which were quickly beginning to loose their firmness, and he would kiss my body until I cried out I wanted him so badly. We would get dressed slowly, then eat a little breakfast or lunch, depending on how long our shower lasted. But as soon as we were done, we would begin our daily adventure. Brennan and I flew the Helix across sweeping mountain ranges, we skimmed the ocean, we weaved in and out of the clouds, and watched miles and miles of forests pass us by. Brennan would put it on autopilot and we would sit together in the front seat, watching the sky light up in blazing reds and pinks, the sun lighting up the clouds, making the sky come to life. The stars would come out, glistening seemingly around us as we would kiss, wrapped up in our love. "What are you thinking about?" I asked lazily, feeling content wrapped up in Brennan's arms one night as we flew back to Sanctuary. "Tomorrow," he told me. His voice sounded far away, like he was in another world. I sighed heavily and settled farther into his body, wanting to feel the security I was lacking. "I'm scared," I admitted. "Me too," he agreed. I looked up at him in surprise; Brennan was never one to show weakness and I knew it had been hard on him to reveal so much of himself in front of me. But to admit he was scared so bluntly and not try to put on a manly show before he finally told me was unusual. "Adam's been working for a full month on this thing. I know he's got every detail down," I tried to assure him. "He better," Brennan said. "I don't want to leave you." "I don't want to loose you either," I agreed weakly. I looked up at him and he looked down at me. We kissed slowly for a second before turning back to the window. "I don't want this to be our last night together," Brennan whispered, looking out among the stars. They shone brilliantly, emanating a mystic wonder that made me think about the future somehow. Tomorrow Brennan would be subject to the strange treatment Adam had created to help with the cellular breakdown. Adam seemed very confident it would work, but it had been his mistake that caused this whole mess. I tried not to think about the notion that Brennan might not be alive in 24 hours, but it was impossible to not think about it. I tried to focus on the positive: that the procedure would prolong his life long enough for Adam to create a permanent solution. Then Brennan and I would be able to have a thousand more nights together. Brennan let go of me and I helped him to his seat in the Helix. I stood at the front, watching as we entered Sanctuary. It didn't feel like coming home, unlike it did every other night. Instead, it felt like we were landing in the GSA headquarters, getting ready to face an enemy, only this time we couldn't see it. We both had grim resolve and determination on our faces as we knew that our last night was closing and in the morning we would have to face the toughest battle yet. 4/24/2004, 7:00 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 6 Brennan lied down on the table, smiling a little for Emma and trying to be brave for us. It wasn't working well; we all had a sick feeling in our stomachs. I could hardly eat and I spent the entire day beating the crap out of holographic GSA agents Emma created for me. She took some pleasure from helping me take my mind off of it. Brennan and Adam were in the med lab talking privately, probably about the details of the procedure they didn't want us to know because we would get too scared. In some ways, I wished I knew everything; the not knowing was killing me, but knowing might be worse. Jesse had disappeared somewhere early in the morning. He had left a note on the computer telling us he was going to check out a lead on a case he had been working on, but when we checked his signal from his comm. ring, he was at a bar. It wasn't really like Jesse to skip out on us when we should have been all together, but Brennan was his brother and Jesse had never been great at dealing with his feelings. Adam walked out of the med lab. Emma noticed first and stopped trying to program the baddies to attack me. When one went down after I stepped on his foot, I realized something was up and I saw Adam and Emma talking. Emma looked agitated, Adam looked disturbed. I jumped off the platform and ran up to them. "What's going on?" I asked, dreading the answer. "Brennan's body isn't responding well to the treatment," Adam answered. "You already did it?" I asked surprised. I wasn't really expecting it to be done so fast, nor was I expecting a huge announcement as to it's beginning, but some notice would have been nice. "We started, but it seems to have sped up the degradation," Adam told me reluctantly. Emma slipped her hand into mine for comfort. I could feel her presence in the back of my mind of her calmness. I wished she wouldn't try to be strong for me. I could be strong for myself. "How's he doing?" Emma asked. "Not well," he said slowly. "His body just took considerable damage on top of its already bad state." "And his emotions?" she asked. "I promised him this would work," Adam said. He cringed unintentionally; it was obvious he was already beating himself up about it. "I made a horrible mistake. I'm sorry, but he's not going to live. And he knows that." I stumbled back, light-headed. Emma, who was already holding my hand, was able to keep me from falling back. "Are you sure?" I managed to force out. My world was spinning. "No," Adam told me. "I promise I'll do everything I can to find out what went wrong. In my tests of the treatment, it worked perfectly, so obviously there is an anomaly in Brennan that I didn't account for. I'm going to find out what it is and allow for that in the treatment." "How long will that take?" Emma asked. "It's luck from here," he told us. "I never saw it before and I don't know what I'm looking for... but I'll do everything I can." "You told us this would work!" I shouted angrily as he walked away. "Dammit Adam! You said you could save him!" Adam didn't answer as he kept walking away from us. I wanted to lunge for him and slit his throat I was so angry, but I immediately regretted those thoughts. Adam had tried to help, he had made a mistake, but he had tried. He wasn't perfect. Obviously, not, since he had created the mutations that kept on trying to kill us. Emma put a hand on my shoulder. "Maybe we should go see Brennan," she suggested quietly. I nodded numbly and walked towards the lab. I couldn't image the emotions that must have been going through him, but I knew his thoughts were of me. He was probably angry that he had tried, he probably thought that he was hurting me worse by dying this way. Brennan was right. This kind of death was worse for me. Starting a relationship with him and allowing myself to think of a future where we could be together forever and then having to let my dreams go was going to hurt me worse. But I didn't care. I only wished Brennan could realize that he was more important than my pain. The promise I had made to him in the beginning floated into my mind...I will love you until you draw your last breath on earth, making sure that the time we have left will not be wasted... Now that this was the end, now that he sat precariously on the edge of death, I wondered if I had fulfilled my promise to him. I had spent all the time I could with him and I found a love inside of me that I didn't know I had. I had tried to make Brennan happy while still making myself happy, like Emma had told me to. I was happier yet in more pain then I had ever been. Yes, I decided, I had done what I had set out to do. But I just couldn't believe this was the end. Brennan would probably die in a matter of days. I smiled bittersweetly. I hated the disease that was killing him, yet if he had never mutated, we wouldn't be in love like we were now. I would rather have lived one month with him than a thousand years without him. I would rather have spend my nights alone for the rest of my life than be made to give up just one of those precious nights on the Helix. And I knew Brennan felt the same way. Yet I would give up every wonderful second of the past month to have him live, no matter how much I hated it. Love was a strange thing. I was about to walk into the lab when I stopped suddenly. Jesse was sitting at Brennan's bedside, talking to him. I knew it wasn't right to eavesdrop, but I was drawn to their conversation. Quietly, I walked to an open window where they couldn't see me, but I could see them. "Your team lost," Jesse was saying. "Damn," Brennan said. "There's a $50 in my room, in the box on my dresser. Take that. If it's not there..." he trailed off, thinking. "When you guys divide up my stuff, make sure you get $50.00 of it." "Don't talk like that," Jesse said admonishingly, but letting the comment slide away, like he was admonishing a young child for saying a cuss word instead of telling him to stop saying he was going to die. I wondered how it could be so easy for him. "I forgot to make a will anyways," Brennan said. "Can you do something for me?" "Anything," Jesse answered. "One day Shalimar's going to leave Mutant X, and so she won't have Adam to take care of her. I have an account at a bank in Europe with enough money to take care of her for the rest of her life. When she leaves, give it to her, kind of as a last gift from me." I stood shocked. Brennan wasn't rich. He did a few jobs for his old friends that got him some money, and Adam gave us a little money, but there was nothing that would give Brennan enough money for me to live on for the rest of my life. And it was so un-Brennan like to not blow it all on some big bet or buy a few cars, or live the good life after he found out he was dying. He must have, I suddenly realized, been saving it for me after he died. "Shalimar isn't going to forget you," Jesse said. I realized I had stopped listening. "We were together a month," Brennan said. "She'll fall in love again and forget about me. It's inevitable." "She loves you. I've never seen her so happy. She'll never forget about you," Jesse assured him. "Her old boyfriend... I forget his name... but she fell in love with him and he died. It took her a while to get over him, but she did, then she fell in love with me. I'll bet she hasn't thought about him since she started getting a crush on me." I sighed quietly but deeply. It was true. I hadn't thought of Richard since I started liking Brennan. But Richard had been different. I have loved him, but I was beyond love with Brennan. Our souls were one. I knew I would think of him every time I wasn't awakened with a kiss. And if one day, I fell in love again, which I couldn't conceive of anyways, and if that man woke me up with a kiss in the morning, I would secretly wish with my whole heart it was Brennan. A tear slid down my cheek as I realized he would probably never wake me up again. My whole body shook as I was engulfed in tears. I got on my knees so I would fall down, and hugged them close to my chest, quietly letting the tears fall down. "You know you're my brother, right?" I heard Brennan ask, his voice faltering. "Always," Jesse whispered, his voice breaking. "Oh god, I'm going to miss you so much." 4/24/2004, 7:01 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Brennan and Jesse were crying in the lab, I was crying outside of it. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be the end. I didn't want to believe it, yet I knew in a few minutes I would have to go in there and say goodbye to the man I loved. I stood up and went around to the door, a surreal peace entering my heart. I took everything in, Brennan and Jesse standing and hugging tightly, tears streaming down both their faces, Adam working in the room next door, separated by a glass wall, working hard to find what went wrong, and Emma helping him. They were trying to stop the inevitable so badly, and as much as I wanted them to find a cure, somehow in my heart I knew the end was here. "Shal," I heard quietly. Jesse walked past me and nodded that it was my turn. He walked out the door and closed it. Wordlessly, I ran to Brennan and wrapped my arms around him. I lay my head on his chest and let the pain of my heart pour out in tears on him. His weak arms were still strong enough to hold me securely against him and he kissed the top of my head over and over again. In one minute we expressed what we could never have said to each other in a thousand years. "I don't want to let you go," Brennan whispered hoarsely. "Then don't," I whispered back, not easing my grip on him. "Don't leave me. I don't know what I'm going to do without you." I could feel Brennan's hot tears fall on the top of my head. "I love you," he said, tightening his hold around me. He was so warm, so comforting, so alive. "I love you, too." "Don't forget me." "Not a chance," I promised. I looked up at him and smiled weakly. "I'm going to miss you." "I know, I know," he whispered slowly, trying to comfort me. "One day, we'll be together again. You just have to hold on until then." "I will." "There's something I have to tell you." I pulled away from him so I could face him, curious as to what it might be. "What is it?" I asked. "When we first kissed, do you remember me saying something?" he asked. "And you asked what it was but I didn't answer you." "Yeah I remember," I answered. "I said 'marry me'," he told me. I began to laugh. "You want to marry me? Now?" "Not now, it's too late, but I did want to." "I would have said yes," I told him. "It's too late now," Brennan repeated. I nodded slowly, sadly. "Do you think things would have been different this past month if we had been married?" I asked. Brennan thought for a moment and smiled. "No," he answered. "I wouldn't have wanted it any other way." "Me either," I agreed. "I-" "I figured it out!" Adam shouted, slamming open the door and running in. "It's right this time, I know it!" Brennan and I looked at each other in complete surprise. "Are you sure you want to?" I asked quietly to him, knowing how torn he was about doing the procedure. "Let's do it," he told me. I smiled, happy that he finally realized that he didn't have to sacrifice himself for me. In a whirlwind of activity, Emma and Adam began running around the lab in a frenzy looking at different computers and preparing various liquids. I joined hands with Brennan, trying to hide my huge smile. “I love you,” I told him. “I love you too.” Brennan hugged me tightly, quickly, and then Emma pushed me out. Brennan lied down on the table while Adam worked over him. I watched anxiously through the glass wall while he inserted a needle into his arm. But then Emma joined Adam at Brennan’s side and they completely blocked him out. I turned away, not sure that I wanted to see it happen anyways. Suddenly, I was aware that Jesse was standing next to me. “I thought you went out drinking,” I said, more angry and hurt than I had meant it. He looked over at me, then down at the floor. “I sat at the pub for three hours,” Jesse confessed. “But I couldn’t bring myself to drink. I knew if I did, I would be letting you all down. I was supposed to be here.” “Yes, you were,” I said, walking off. I went down the hall towards my room, trying to ignore what was going on in the lab, but I couldn’t ignore the feeling that I had had right before I went in to see Brennan: that this was the end. 4/24/2004, 7:02 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Nalaniangel24 Head Administrator Global user Registered: 04-2004 Posts: 70 Karma: 0 (+0/-0) Reply | Quote Re: Challenges Chapter 7 I stood in front of the mirror, feeling the emptiness inside of me grow. I looked so plain, so ugly, without him. The image facing me repulsed me and tried to look away, but I couldn’t. I knew that this was what I would look like from now on. I would always be haunted by what was and what was taken away. Brennan was supposed to be at my side, but he was missing. I could easily remember the first time I had seen our reflection in the mirror, the day after he had told me he was dying. That was the beginning; this was the end. “This is not the end,” I whispered to myself, trying to make myself believe that Adam’s new treatment was going to work. Adam was sure about it, Brennan seemed hopeful, but my stomach just wouldn’t agree with me that he wasn’t already dead. I hoped to God that it wasn’t my sixth sense. The tears slipped down my face once again as I tried to accept that Brennan might be dead. I was in anguish, yet calmed at the same time. I wanted Brennan to live so much that I would kill myself to save him; he was my life force, my shelter, my everything. But we had made our peace with it. He wasn’t sacrificing himself for me anymore either. I threw myself on the bed uncomfortably and by some miracle, I managed to fall into an unrestful sleep. “Wake up,” I heard softly, and I felt someone’s lips on my forehead. My heart leapt in joy, but I could not will my eyes open in fear that I might be dreaming still. I felt the lips on my face again. “Shalimar, don’t tell me you’ve died…” “That’s not funny,” I murmured, slowly opening my eyes. I was face to face with Brennan. He looked tired and in slight pain, but happy. “Did it…” I asked, trailing off. He turned his head and for a second I thought he was going to tell me it hadn’t, but then he broke out into a grin and slowly lied down on the bed next to me. “I’ve got three years,” he said nonchalantly, putting his hands behind his head in a makeshift pillow way. I jumped on top of him, momentarily forgetting he was still a sick man, and kissed him over and over again, ecstatically. “You’re really alive,” I whispered finally, gazing into his eyes. “No, I’m not…” I jumped out of bed with a start, breathing hard. My lights were off, but with my feral senses, I knew nobody else was in the room. It had just been a dream. “No!” I shouted frustratedly, hitting my pillow hard. “Dammit!” I heard footsteps running down the hall and then a rushed knock on the door. Without waiting for my permission, Jesse ran in. “Are you okay?” he asked worriedly. “Fine,” I muttered bitterly, despair and anger taking over. Jesse came over and gently knelt on the bed next to me. “Shal, I know you better than anyone. You’re not fine, so don’t try and tell me you are.” I sighed. “I just-“ I ran my fingers through my stringy, sweat-soaked hair, and let out my breath shakily. “I just need to know if he’s alright.” Jesse gathered me up into his arms and hugged me for a long time. “Whatever happens, I’ll be here for you,” he promised me. “I know.” I let go and stood up with him, but immediately swayed, dizzily. “Are you feeling alright?” Jesse asked, holding onto me. “When was the last time you ate? Do you want some water?” “I’m fine,” I managed to tell him again. “Just tired. What about you? You’re a little on edge.” “Considering the circumstances, I think I’m doing alright,” Jesse answered. “You were asleep for three hours and I’ve been updating the New Mutant database to try to get my mind off of it. Emma was told to leave the lab about an hour ago. Do you want to go see if Adam has any news?” I nodded numbly and began to walk towards the door. Jesse walked behind me, protective as always, in case I fell again. The hallway seemed to go on forever; I never thought we would get to the end. The med lab’s fluorescent lights shone like a beacon in the rest of the dark Sanctuary and we both stumbled towards it tiredly, way overstressed and on edge. We stopped at the door and looked inside. Adam was looking over a computer screen. Brennan couldn’t be seen from our angle. I wondered anxiously what was going on. “Adam wanted me to come get you,” Emma said behind us. We both jumped; Jesse accidentally massed in surprise. As soon as we regained our composure, we both walked in the lab with Emma, facing it with grim resolve. At this point, I thought I could take anything. We stood in a row against a wall lined with cabinets. I was standing in the middle, holding both of their hands. Adam stood in front of us with his back turned, still looking at his computer screen. There was a tense feeling in the air, and an eternity went by before Adam slowly turned around. “When I developed the first treatment, I was using blood samples I took when I first found out. What I failed to realize is that Brennan’s DNA mutated further after the sample was taken. It had the reverse effect on Brennan, causing his cells to break down at an increased rate. I realized what had happened and I created a new treatment, this time taking in account the new mutation. But when applied the second time, Brennan’s cells were too damaged, he was too weak.” Adam paused, trying not to break down. “What happened?” Jesse asked, trying to get Adam to continue. “I’m so sorry,” he cried softly. “No…” I whispered, clenching Emma and Jesse’s hands tightly. “Brennan died.” I never woke up again without thinking first of Brennan’s morning kisses. I never saw another star without remembering the nights we spent wrapped up in our love on the Helix. I hate my reflection. I feel so empty when I look at myself without him at my side. I never loved another man in my life. Nobody I ever met was even close to as good as Brennan was. Now, ten years later, as I stand at his grave and wonder what could have been, I can close my eyes and remember watching him as he slept, wondering what I had done do deserve such a man, and I thank him, because even though the pain he caused me was great, now I know that living without his love in me would have been greater. Finished. 4/24/2004, 7:02 pm Send Email to Nalaniangel24   Send PM to Nalaniangel24 Add a reply Powered by AkBBS 0.9.5b  -  Link to us   -  Blogs   -  Hall of Honour   -  Chat Click here to get your own free message board You are not logged in (login)      Board's time is: 9/6/2008, 3:49 pm